Valentines Via Weretortoise

Nancy watched the tortoise tote the large box of Valentine’s Day candy to her front porch. It struggled when it came to the steps and she rubbed her forehead in shock. Walking through the front door, past Jack-o-Lanterns, she studied the tortoise’s persistent efforts.

This arrangement wasn’t working.

Carefully approaching, she held out her hand. It dutifully let go of the box and coughed. Red elastic string tied around the box held a note. “What are you thinking?” she muttered with a smile and opened the note first.

“Dear Nancy,” it read. “If you’re reading this, you have received the candy I’ve sent through Ted. He escaped with me from the lab, but has found it impossible to return to his human form (and here I thought the life of a werewolf was a pain). However, we believe a tortoise has a better chance of getting to you than a wolf, even if it takes much longer. Less chance of facing buckshot. The candy is both to celebrate Valentine’s and apologize for the lateness of his arrival. We were hoping for Easter at the latest. Please send me your reply through Ted as soon as you can. Love always, Steve.”

No, this wasn’t working. Her smile grew. It didn’t matter. She could see Steve’s goofy grin as he wrote this. Handing Ted a small unlit jack-o-lantern to munch on, she went inside to compose her reply.

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